In an ideal world, you've been kept updated on your parents’ health care and finances for several years before they scale down or move to a senior living community. If your world is not ideal and you do not know much about your parents’ matters, get information on these two imperative items as soon as possible, and keep up to date going forward. It would be very unfortunate to have a health or financial situation and be completely unaware as to their position. Questioning your parents about their finances is difficult, but being surprised when you learn your dad's “best friend” is that Nigerian prince living in the Tokyo airport and has stolen all your parents’ money is tougher.
Have the dialogues when there is no urgency, and your mother does not feel like you’re pressuring her to move from her house. The more you and your siblings can glean over the dinner table, the better off you'll all be when you need to make decisions hurriedly. Convene with their attorneys and doctors to ensure that you can assist in managing affairs if needed and that you can access medical and health care reports if there's an emergency. These two things are incredibly important if you are more than a couple of hours away, as you could need to handle things remotely. HIPAA states that even if your mom's doctor was your second-grade t-ball buddy, without the right permissions in writing, they cannot tell you anything.
What to Take?
For a lot of families, selecting one sibling to be the point person for legal issues pales in comparison to working out who is going to decide what belongings move to the new house, what will be donated, and which sibling gets the family china. Don't allow this commence a family rift, your parents are moving and will most likely keep the china and silver. In any case, most downsizes come with a significant loss of space—going from a three or four-bedroom house to one or two bedrooms and one living space--so there is lots of items to go around.
Once your clan has come to the conclusion that downsizing is the way to go for your parents, if they will be going to a senior community, there is usually a waiting period of several months before their unit is ready for them. Most communities remodel the units before a new resident comes in. If the prior resident had lived there for many years, they might do a full update—so you'll commonly get things like new kitchen counters and appliances, Wi-Fi, and updated bathroom fixtures along with fresh paint and flooring. These weeks offer your parents time to grow accustomed to the plan of moving, especially if they are moving to a new area.
Ask for a print-out of the floor plan of their new abode or apartment. Some retirement communities will provide you not only a floor plan, but some peel-off furniture stickers so you can actually place the furniture and accessories. The stickers can be moved around the paper, so you can play decorator until you find the best layout. This is a big help emotionally, realizing ahead of time what they can move with them and how it will take up the space. Being around themselves with familiar belongings and mementos can take some of the sting out of leaving home.
Leading up to Moving Day in Houston
Moving day for your parents is going to be tough, even if you have planned everything to the last detail, and however much they are ready to move out of the house and not have to deal with the yard anymore. Here's a short schedule to get ready for the big day, giving you about eight weeks to get gear up.
Two Months Out
Hire a professional moving company. Look at your budget to decide if you would like a full-service move, a la carte (select only certain services the movers do) or rent a truck and do it yourself.
Figure out if you will need some storage, and where you want it to be. Most moving companies have storage options, which can be very helpful. It’s not uncommon for people to wish to have a few more options before they make the final . In addition, when college-age kids are around, some families elect to hold on to old furniture and other things that will be of use in first apartments.
Begin determining what you parents can move, which items you and your siblings want, and which belongings to give to charity. However you prefer to divvy up, you will need to designate what goes to whom. Assorted colored small sticky notes are a great way to sort things, so that the correct items wind up going to the right places.
Work with your parents on what to donate--although the thought of a moving sale is inviting, if cash flow is not an issue, you'll likely do better donating most items and taking the write-off. If they have valuable items, ask a local antiques dealer to appraise them prior to donating. Some non-profits, like Habitat for Humanity, Goodwill, and the Salvation Army, can even send a truck to collect your donated things. Call a week or so out to schedule pick up.
One Month Out
Start cleaning out cabinets, closets, the basement, garage, etc. If you've got more stuff than ambition, hire a company to come clean out once you have moved everything that you want out of the home. This is well worth the money, especially if you don’t live nearby and your parents are having a hard time with the move. You can also set up to have the moving company move the household goods and personal possessions before the remainder of the home is cleared out, sparing your mom and dad from seeing their residence looking empty and sad.
If you are doing your own packing, purchase acceptable-quality packing supplies. The moving company will offer the best quality at the lowest cost and can give packing suggestions. Again, bring out the sticky notes for the boxes or be organized with keeping them in order. If everyone is closeby, it is easy to bring over some big tubs and be able to leave later with old prom dresses and diving trophies all packed up in the car. That's usually not the case, so as you box things up, label them accordingly and place them in the recipient's bedroom or a labeled area of the living room.
One Week Out
Verify your dates with the moving company, both for the move to the new home and putting items in storage. If you are not sure the space of storage you will require, they can assist you in figuring it out, you will probably truly need double the space you think.
Plan a two-prong strategy for this day. Have one sibling, grandchild or friend take your parents out for brunch, and then on to their new home. You or a sibling stay behind to manage the movers. Mitigate as much worry as you can that morning, so when the truck gets to their place your parents aren't tired and anxious. Help them unpack and get settled, and do not be shocked if they're invited to dinner—they are the new kids on the block and in high demand.
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